It never fails. After three minutes of someone new stepping into a Pilates studio the first words out of their mouths sounds a little something like, “these machines look like they’re for S&M”. Oh really? So you’re familiar with BDSM? In that case, step into my dungeon and I’ll show you the true meaning of pain.
Honestly, when I started with Pilates 6 years ago I never once, even for a split second, thought that Joseph Pilates’ machines looked like ones found in a dominatrixes dungeon. A client pointed out that I certainly would not see it that way because I already have a little dominatrix living inside me. These things are “normal” to you, she pointed out. The little control monster in me enjoys impelling exercise-induced pain onto my clients.
I’m not sure why I haven’t written about the striking parallel (pun intended) between the Pilates instructor and the Dominatrix before. Our jobs are so uniquely similar it’s wickedly frightening.
If you’re not familiar with BDSM let me break it down for you. The term BDSM is derived from the words Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, and Sadism and Masochism.
If you have ever worked out on the Pilates Cadillac or the Pilates Reformer you are well aware of the spring-loaded rope and pulley system in which hands and feet are most often times bound within loops to create strict, but fluid movements.
In a one-on-one private session the client is usually laying on their back, strapped to the machine and basically ordered to move in a precise way. Joseph Pilates designed hundreds of exercises that are to be performed exactly as he intended them, including breathing when you are supposed to breath. Pilates instructors are sticklers for form and detail. If we see that our client does not have the precision down we repeat until they give us what we want. We even have toys and props, like the Magic Circle, bands and balls of all sizes to intensify the session and make it more challenging.
Tie them up to the rack (Bondage) and bark orders at them (Discipline and Dominance) while they eagerly comply (Submission) and pay for the hour of sweat and torture (Sado/Masochism). I’m still talking about a typical Pilates session here, but doesn’t that sound a lot like what a Dominatrix does, too?
What exactly is a dominatrix? A dominatrix is a professional dominant woman who charges money to engage in fantasy and fetish play with clients, called her submissives. Some dommes are not professional, but lifestyle dominants, who take control of their personal relationships both inside and outside the bedroom. It is quite common for the professional dominatrix to have a personal slave or sub who are not paying clients. They live to serve their master and will typically perform housework and run errands for her. A dominatrix is not a prostitute. They do not engage in sexual contact with paying clientele. The classic dominatrix look is black lingerie, corsets, catsuits, thigh-high boots, stockings and stilettos, made of anything from vinyl, leather, latex and PVC.
The Pilates instructor and Dominatrix are the ones in control of the session the entire time and enjoy pushing boundaries, but only within their clients’ capabilities and wants. Both work/dominate privately or in small groups. We also both have specialties and areas of expertise. For example, some Pilates instructors, like myself, specialize in pre-and-post natal, golf, and injuries, while others refuse to work with a pregnant woman. Dominatrices also have specialties, such as bondage techniques, corporal punishment and medical play.
However, the two things the Dominatrix has over the Pilates instructor: A kickass wardrobe and a better pay rate. I’m doubly jealous.
Before I leave you with your mind in a Kinbaku let’s go over a checklist one more time of the similarities between the Pilates instructor and the Dominatrix, shall we? I said YES!
- Pilates studio vs. Dungeon…check!
- Cadillac vs. The Rack…check!
- Ropes, straps and suspension vs. ropes, straps and suspension…double check!
- Leather, vinyl and D-rings vs. Latex, PVC and D-rings…check!
- Verbal cueing vs. Verbal domination…check!
- Pilates toys and props vs. Dominatrix’s toys and props…check!
- Pushing your client to their limits vs. Edge play…check!
- Training your client in Pilates positions vs. Formal slave training…check!
I really can go on and on with this dichotomy, but you get the picture. Pilates is fun and challenging and must always be done with a professional Pilates instructor to ensure precision and safety, and the best part is my clients always come back for more! I bet the Dominatrix would say the same thing about her line of work as well.
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